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How to ask your spouse for a divorce

 Posted on April 18, 2023 in Divorce

Whether you approach the situation with a, “Hey honey, I think we should divorce, or “I’m through with you. This marriage is over,” telling your spouse that you want to divorce won’t be easy.

The following tips might help if you are wondering where to begin:

Choose your moment carefully

Be considerate when picking a moment. Straight after your spouse has returned from someone’s funeral or the day before they have a big exam is not the right time. Nor are events such as your child’s birthday. Once you have this conversation, your spouse will struggle to think about much else for at least a few days, so pick a time when they have a clear schedule ahead.

Know what you’re going to say

You do not need a whole speech mapped out, but you need to be clear about what you are telling them to avoid mixed messages. If your decision is final, you need to convey that, not make it sound like there is still a chance to turn things around.

Be prepared to listen

Where safety is not an issue, it’s only fair to allow your spouse to reply to your announcement. If, however, your spouse is abusive or controlling, you may want to say your piece and get out of there. Or even get out of there and tell them over the phone from a safe distance.

Have a plan for the next few days

Ask a friend or relative if you can stay with them for a few days. You and your spouse are both going to need some space. If you’ve got kids, consider arranging for someone to take them for a day or two to spare them the drama.

The other thing you should do is seek legal advice to get a clearer picture of the divorce process and your options moving forward.

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